a suicide romance
has found it's way inside my heart
a predestined end
has found it's way into our beginning-
I swore I would make sure someone was at home
before I took the ride there
it's not easy to find that she's in over my head
it's not easy to find that I'm in over her head
you are free
and then you'll be gone
I'm fixed on the end
it is lurking
it is oozing on my breath
it is spilling on the flowers I've grown for you-
I'm just out to find the better part of me
more than a waving goodbye
I want to be bigger than the inevitable
I'm too practiced at the ungraceful goodbye
I can't prepare myself for another one like this
there's something inside of me that refuses to act undisturbed
I dreamt that we made a promise to try to make it work
and woke up just before I told you-
I know I should be happy in your name
here on the border of love
it just seems old to me
taking the risk
making the compromises with my heart
that knows somewhere that it will lose again-
is that what it's all about?
tell me
is this what it's all about?
here in the carefully resurrected world of unavailability
I find my beginning again
it's been a long time coming-
the cycle repeats itself over and over
but baby there's something about you
that I can hold on to
that I want to hold on to
I'm just in time to see the sunshine in your eyes rise and set
I burn you into my memory
I turn off all the lights and wait for my love to come out of hiding
Baby, there's something about you that I can hold onto for a long time
I'm gonna hold onto this
I coax the easiness out of my smile and sing for a little while to you-
morning comes and I remind myself that there's something waiting for me
outside myself-
I walk towards the inevitable
with arms open
and closing around you
I'm not ready for this sort of thing I hear a voice whispering in the back of my head
but I would give anything
not to be out of love
for you-
I am out of touch again
but I've got your smile-
I'm out of myself again
but I've got your eyes-
I'm out of whack again
but I've got your sweet kiss-
I'm out in love again
and I've got your name-
I'm out of love again
but I've got your love
I'm out of my head again
because you've got my love-
but I'm all right
I'm all right-
I've never felt this way before
but I'm all right
feel all right-
cause I'm giving in to it
I'm feeling fine
feeling fine-
cause I'm gonna win this time-
and it's a long time coming...
